So this poem was introduced to me through a workshop (workshop by proxy, maybe?) I wasn't there but another member sent the poem to me and I kind of love it.
The Quiet World
by Jeffrey McDaniel
In an effort to get people to look
into each other’s eyes more,
and also to appease the mutes,
the government has decided
to allot each person exactly one hundred
and sixty-seven words, per day.
When the phone rings, I put it to my ear
without saying hello. In the restaurant
I point at chicken noodle soup.
I am adjusting well to the new way.
Late at night, I call my long distance lover,
proudly say I only used fifty-nine today.
I saved the rest for you.
When she doesn’t respond,
I know she’s used up all her words,
so I slowly whisper I love you
thirty-two and a third times.
After that, we just sit on the line
and listen to each other breathe.
I enjoy the premise of this poem a lot and although there isn't a strict rhythm (eg. iambic pentameter), there is a quiet rhythm to it.
I love the broader message critiquing how people stare at their phones (guilty as charged!) but I also love the quiet passion there towards the author's lover.
Some questions I'm proposing:
Could this be classed as a love poem?
Do you think there's any significance to the numbers (167, 59, 32 and a third)?
Is there also a commentary on manners? Eg. not saying hello, just pointing at the menu etc.?
Can't wait to here what you think!
I'm not sure about the coincidence that @Marc mentions, but I did the math and the speaker uses exactly 73 words up till they say "I love you" thirty-two and a third times. Which means the speaker has exactly 94 words left before saying "I love you" and when you divide 94 by thirty-two and a third (94 / 32.333) you get roughly 2.9, which means the speaker has approximately one-third a word left.